Adolescence is a critical period of development, when the desire to fit in becomes stronger every day. During this time, peer influence can become one of the most powerful forces in a teen’s life, motivating a majority of their decisions. The heavy influence of peer pressure can cause anxiety for both the child and parent. And while some peer influence can be a positive, it can also result in poor decisions and, every parent’s worst fear, dangerous situations. So how do you support your child’s independence while also protecting them from peer pressure? Here are some tips below:
Open Communication
The foundation of a trusting parent/child relationship is open, non-judgmental communication. You want to be a safe space for your child to come with their highs and lows; this relationship will be invaluable as they begin to explore friendships of their own. As they form relationships, stay curious and ask questions. If they’re experiencing peer pressure, it’s important they feel safe to bring it to you.
Critical Thinking Skills
Encourage your child to think critically about the consequences of their choices. You can do this by asking open-ended questions like, “How would you feel if…?” or “What might happen if…?” Teaching them to evaluate the long-term effects of their actions will strengthen their ability to make independent, responsible decisions. We all know we can’t tell our children what decisions to make: the best thing we can do is teach them how to make their own.
Strengthen Self Esteem
When children have a stronger sense of who they are, they’re less likely to find their identity in the influence of others. Help your child build confidence by acknowledging their strengths, offering praise for their efforts, and encouraging them to pursue interests and hobbies that align with their values. With a strong self esteem, they not only avoid negative peer pressure but become a positive influence for the peers around them.
Establish Clear Boundaries
While adolescence is a time of gaining independence, you are still their parent and independence needs to be balanced with structure and guidance in the home. Establish clear, consistent rules and expectations around behaviors such as curfews, academic responsibilities, and social interactions. Make sure your child understands the reasoning behind these boundaries instead of simply telling them “yes” and “no”.
Peer pressure is a natural part of development. Friends influence one another and your child’s friendships will affect who they are in one way or another. While it may be difficult to watch your child make the wrong decisions, your support will always be the place they can return. Use your relationship to bring a positive influence to your child’s development where you can – in the home. The rest is up to them and made easier with your support.
If your kid is struggling to cope with peer pressure and you notice persistent changes in behavior, mood, or academic performance, there is support available. Talk with a member of Decade2Connect today to discuss next steps.